Wrecker Page 21

  Johnenry! It was only Johnenry.

  ‘Quick, get in here before you’re seen,’ I said. ‘What are you thinking of, coming here like this? Are you sure you nobody saw you?’

  ‘I saw a light in the cottage. I go his way every night so nobody will think it strange to see me pass by. I’m due on the night core in an hour. I’ll be late and my pay will be docked, but damn them to hell.’ He stood there, not knowing where to put himself. He coughed – a dry, hacking, rattling noise.

  ‘You’d better have a good reason for calling on me at this hour. What if Loveday finds out you’ve been here?’

  ‘She’s got no claim on me.’

  ‘Oh wisht! What are you saying of?’

  He sat down across the table from me. In the queasy light, he looked sickly and drawn. He coughed again.

  ‘It’s the mine that gave you that cough, isn’t it?’ I said.

  ‘I started working shifts in the bal to save up for the wedding with Loveday. But there ain’t going be no wedding.’

  I thought of Loveday getting her wedding linen together for after the nuptials and then getting this news. ‘Why are you doing this? What madness has come over you?’ I said.

  ‘I hear you and the minister have fallen out.’ He smiled, a grisly sight. ‘He ain’t been seen near you for weeks.’

  I was trembling now, fearing what he’d say next. ‘What are you doing here, Johnenry?’

  ‘It’s not too late for us, Mary.’

  ‘Shush! You’ve been drinking.’

  ‘I’ll treat you as you deserve to be treated.’

  ‘No more foolishness,’ I said. ‘Things are bad enough for me already, without this. You must go.’

  ‘We can get away from here. They’ll give us a cottage near the mine. We can start a new life.’

  Wasn’t this what I wanted, to flee the village and all my troubles? I thought of summer days long ago when Johnenry and I lay on the rocks at Tombstone Point, dreaming about what would become of us.

  ‘I’ll never let you down. I’m not like your parson,’ he said.

  ‘I’m not running away with you,’ I said. ‘I’m fond of you, as a sister is of a brother, but I don’t love you, Johnenry. I am sorry to say it, truly I am. Now you must go. Go to Loveday. Get down on your knees and beg her to take you back.’

  ‘I’ve loved you since I was in my thirteenth, Mary. I’ll never love another.’

  ‘That’s enough.’ I stood up and went to the door. ‘I’m going out to see if the way is clear. Follow me into the alley in a moment, and I’ll signal when it’s safe for you to go.’

  He stood up. ‘Mary, I . . .’

  ‘Quiet now!’

  How loud my footsteps sounded in the dark, clacking on the timbers over the fish cellar. I went to the end of the narrow alley and looked up and down the lane. It was clear, so I waved for Johnenry to follow me. He squeezed past, taking me in his arms. I felt the stubble on his chin as his mouth tried to find mine, but I struggled free of him. ‘Never!’

  I pushed him out of the alley and into the lane, and ran back inside.

  Sometime later there was another rap on the door. I gave no answer but there was another knock, so I opened the door a crack and found Johnenry out there.

  ‘You’re not coming in,’ I said. ‘Get on your way.’ I slammed the door and bolted it.

  It was quiet for a while, then a kind of howling began, like an animal caught in a trap. Johnenry was still out there in the courtyard and calling my name over and over. When I could bear it no longer, I opened the door and threw a pail of water over him.

  ‘Be gone with you! I never want to see you again.’

  The next morning I was awoken by a loud banging on the front door. Still half asleep, I crept downstairs and opened it, half thinking I’d find Johnenry standing there, but the courtyard was empty. I went down the alley, and looked up and down the lane, but no one was to be seen. It was only when I went back that I found a reward notice had been pinned to the door. I tore it off and crumpled it in my fist.

  I got dressed, trying to think of how to free myself from the trap I’d fallen into, and I remembered what Gideon had said. If the worst came to the worst, I could call on him. But how was I to reach him? And did he still feel the same way? He’d barely set foot in the cove these past weeks.

  At that moment, I heard voices out in the courtyard. It was Tegen and Tobias Hawkey, the preacher. I ran to the dresser, taking up a pen and ink and sat down at the table to scribble a note on an old envelope. Having no time to seal it, I folded it and put it in my apron pocket.

  Sir,

  You will quickly guess who writes this note. You once told me I could turn to you if I were ever in the direst need. That moment has come. I beg you to meet with me on Friday next at that place we once went to at night to rid this village of a foolish superstition. Go before sunrise so that you will not be spied upon or followed.

  I would not ask this of you, were I not in the gravest peril. While it will be some risk to you, I will avail to shield you from any dishonour. In hopes that you will heed this plea,

  Your servant,

  X

  As I finished, Tegen plodded wearily into the kitchen. I rushed out and through the courtyard. Tobias was walking briskly down the lane. I called after him and he turned about, retraced his steps and followed me into the courtyard.

  ‘I have remembered your mother in my prayers, Mary.’

  ‘Thank you, that’s kind. You won’t mind me asking a favour of you?’

  ‘Not at all.’

  ‘When are you next going to Newlyn?’

  ‘On the morrow. I have a meeting with Mr Stone.’

  ‘That is lucky, for I have a note for the minister.’ I took the note out of my pocket and handed it to him. ‘Will you give this to him, as soon as ever you may?’

  ‘It’s to do with the Sunday school, I suppose.’

  ‘Of course. I think the minister would prefer that you didn’t peruse it. There are some confidential matters to do with the funding.’

  ‘You may depend upon it.’ He looked at me and frowned. ‘You’re wasting away, Mary. Your Mamm’s passing has taken its toll on you, I fear. I wonder now, how are you getting on in your soul?’

  ‘Let’s talk of this another time, ’Bias. I’ve work to do.’

  He took a step closer to me. ‘You have a true friend in me, Mary. If there’s aught that’s troubling you, don’t suffer in silence.’

  ‘You’ve heard some nonsense about me, perhaps.’

  ‘I’ve no time for loose talk. I only ask that you don’t cut yourself off from human fellowship.’

  ‘If you wish to help me, give this note to the minister.’

  He put the note in his jacket pocket. ‘I should warn you that Mr Stone hasn’t been himself of late.’

  ‘Has he been taken ill?’

  He thought for a moment. ‘We must pray for him.’

  ‘He is sick then?’

  ‘I’d rather not speak of the man’s affairs.’

  ‘And what of Mrs Stone?’

  ‘She is returned to Newlyn.’

  I might have swooned had not Tobias caught me by the arm. ‘If you have something on your conscience, Mary, it’s best that you to share it,’ he said.

  ‘Give the note to the minister, ’Bias. That’s all I ask.’

  18

  Friday came. I waited in the old church a long time in darkness thick as tar, my back against a pillar, afraid to move because of the thumps and creaks and scratching all around me. The old ruin was no more than a great, cold tomb, full of the bones of the dead. In daylight’s first glimmers, the pews took ghostly form, and a pale shape with outstretched wings dropped out of the black depths of the tower and floated over my head through the nave. At first I thought it an angel fallen from Heaven to scare me away, but it let out a shivering hoot before it turned about and flew back into the tower. It was only an owl, home from its night haunts. Outside on the moor, the world
slowly filled with sound, of birdsong, the lowing of cows and the bleating of sheep. And yet there was no sign of Gideon. I had almost given up hope when at last the church door wrenched open and footsteps sounded on the flags. The steps came to a halt a few feet away. I could make out a tall figure in the near darkness.

  ‘Make yourself known to me if you are here. Speak,’ he said.

  ‘Over here,’ I whispered.

  He walked over and stood before me, broad and solid.

  ‘I hope you’ve good reason for summoning me here. I hadn’t intended to come to Porthmorvoren again until the chapel build was complete. And that was to be my last visit.’

  ‘I have no one else to turn to. I fear Aunt Madgie may accuse me of a dreadful crime any day now.’

  ‘I doubt it. You country people are notorious for being thick as thieves.’

  ‘You saw how she railed against me at the Lovefeast. And the other day I saw the Justice go to her house.’

  ‘What possible crime have you committed that the better part of your neighbours aren’t equally guilty of?’

  ‘I didn’t do it. It’s all muck and stink. But Johnenry came to the cottage the other night and asked me to wed him, and when I refused, he woke the whole village with his bawling. He’s left Loveday for me, and that’s another nail in my coffin.’

  He put a hand to his forehead. ‘And these trifles are what possessed you to drag me all the way from Newlyn?’

  ‘No, there’s worse, far worse. I think Aunt Madgie might have told the Justice I’m the cannibal,’ I cried. ‘That’s why I called for you. I can hardly breathe for fear of it. She saw me by the body that morning and with blood on my lips. I own to that. It was because . . . I am too ashamed to admit it.’

  ‘But you did not commit that dreadful act?’

  ‘How can you even think it? I took her boots, that’s all. I hit myself in the mouth with one of them and that’s where the blood came from. I know that’s wicked enough in its own right, but I swear to God I’ll never do such a thing again. That day when Pentecost gave you a hiding, and you told me how you came under conviction, I believed that I could raise myself up from what I’d been. I swore from that day I would never go wrecking again. You told me the Maker’s saving grace was for all sinners, so long as they believed.’

  ‘I’m hard pressed to know just what it is you do believe, Mary Blight.’

  ‘My neighbours will take against me, and after you’re gone and there’ll be nobody to defend me.’

  ‘My deputy Tobias will exert his influence to prevent the villagers admonishing you too severely.’

  ‘You would not stand there so unfeeling if you knew all the strife that has befallen me. Even my own sister has turned against me. My dear Mamm is dead, and lies out there in that cold soil.’

  ‘I will pray for her soul. However, circumstances constrain me from doing more on your behalf. I’ve had good cause to avoid you in recent weeks, as you are aware. After the unfortunate antics at the Lovefeast, I thought it was all the more important we were not seen again in each other’s company. I couldn’t allow anything or anyone to put at risk the establishment of a proper place of worship in this cove.’

  ‘I’ll flee this village then. I’m not safe here,’ I cried.

  ‘Do not upset yourself any further. Here, please.’ He held out a white pocket handkerchief. ‘If you insist on fleeing the village, I can offer you a little money. I can also furnish you with a written reference that might help you secure work elsewhere. Then again, it might not, given my own current circumstances. However, I must counsel you against this course.’

  ‘But if that old woman tells the Justice I’m the cannibal?’

  ‘It’s your word against hers. She hasn’t a shred of evidence. Without a doubt, it will be hard on you, but in time the differences between you and your neighbours will heal. We must all surrender to God’s will, and think of the life to come.’

  ‘So this is why you’re here. To give a sermon and throw me a few coins?’

  ‘I came here because I gave you my word.’

  ‘But you had to creep here before dusk, and run the risk of being seen. Didn’t you come because you wanted to see me again?’

  ‘On the contrary. I came here to put an end to this once and for all. My wife has come home.’

  ‘You don’t love her,’ I said.

  ‘Our conversation is at an end.’ He turned and walked towards the door.

  ‘Run away, then,’ I called. ‘I see you now for what you are – a weak and cowardly man.’

  His stopped, then slowly turned and took a few paces towards me. ‘Very well. As you are intent on provoking me, perhaps you should know something of my present circumstances.’ He reached inside his jacket and pulled out a folded piece of paper. ‘Here. Read this.’

  I sat on the end of a bench, opened the paper and found it was a letter.

  To: Mr Gideon Stone

  IN UTMOST CONFIDENCE

  October 3rd 18—

  SIR, — As superintendent of the Penwith circuit, it is my duty to inform you that two complaints of a grave nature concerning your conduct have been submitted to the circuit office. Should the claims be proven true, they would amount to a serious breach of the discipline of the Conference. The claimants are two women, below named:

  Mrs Louisa Trevellick of St Just, aged twenty-seven;

  Miss Anne Treveil of St Buryan, aged twenty-four.

  I do herby summon you to a meeting at the superintendent’s office in Penzance at 11 a.m. on 21st October with a panel of three lay and three ordained members of the Society, whereat you will have the opportunity to respond to the statements of the two claimants. I advise you to prepare your own statement in advance of the meeting. A fair copy of the claims made against you is appended to this missive.

  The panel will consider whether the matter can be reconciled to the satisfaction of all parties. Should we fail to achieve reconciliation, however, I will be obliged to refer the matter to a disciplinary hearing of the Methodist Conference.

  I advise you that forthwith you are suspended from your ministerial duties until further notice.

  Due to the serious nature of these complaints, I must advise you that, should the charges be established, the committee is required to take steps up to and including an order that you cease to be in full connexion, i.e. you will be dismissed as a minister.

  I am, sir, your most obedient servant,

  Mr J— W—

  Superintendent,

  Penwith Methodist Circuit, Cornwall

  After that, I could think of nothing to say. He broke a long silence with a cough. ‘So now you understand,’ he said. ‘This is the consequence of my surrender to base appetites. We must subdue such desires. We’re not like the animals. God has endowed us with moral faculties.’

  A shaft of light lit his face and I saw how careworn and lined he was, with deep shadows under his eyes.

  ‘But that same God who made the animals also made you,’ I said. ‘Can we always be so sure what God wants of us? It seems to me that we can no more deny our Nature than the birds or beasts of the field.’

  He laughed, a dry and bitter sound. ‘I hadn’t thought to hear such sophistry from a plain, uneducated woman. Remember we’re in God’s house. Take care not to blaspheme.’

  I got up from the bench, and took a step towards him. ‘We both need to escape our troubles. Millie Hicks stitched us together that time, and shamed us, but weren’t we fastened to each other all along? You chose me because it was meant.’

  ‘I chose you as Sunday school teacher, not as . . . Or at least I gave myself to understand . . . That is to say . . .’ He threw his head back and groaned. ‘What a fool I’ve been all these months. I made myself believe the Holy Spirit was working within me and construed strong emotion as proof of faith. But it was something else.’ His fists were clenched.

  ‘So, you are like other men,’ I said. ‘Is that so bad? I wonder if anyone in this world is just what t
hey seem. Everything is show in these times. Even your wife has her secrets.’

  He turned and glared at me. ‘I warn you not to insult my wife.’

  ‘The face she shows the world is not the one I saw.’

  He stepped towards me, bracing himself as if he might strike me. Before he could, I ran to him and hugged him, my head on his breast. He turned his face away and raised his hands aloft.

  ‘Every step I take, a snare is waiting for me,’ he said.

  ‘It doesn’t matter to me what you’ve done.’ His heart pounded under my cheek. ‘God made you the man you are.’

  ‘No more,’ he said, trying to push me away. But I squeezed him in my arms until something inside him seemed to give.

  ‘Sister Blight, end this madness now, please, before . . .’

  He seized my wrists, freed himself and staggered backwards, but I took his hands and put them around my waist. In a moment, we were kissing. He threw his coat down on the cold stone slabs under the tower at the back of the church and we lay down beside each other. His hands roved wherever they pleased, handling me as if I was I was a priceless china-clay doll that might easily shatter. He raised my skirts and gazed at my limbs with the wonder Adam must have shown for Eve when first he beheld her in the Garden. How hot and heavy he was when he lay on top of me. He slid into me without let or hindrance, and I threw my head back, falling upwards into darkness too deep to fathom.

  19

  Afterwards, we stood together in the church.

  ‘Will you abandon me now?’ I asked. My throat was dry and my voice no more than a croak.

  ‘No, not after this,’ he said, patting the dust from his coat. ‘We are meant to be together for good or ill. It is no use denying it.’

  ‘But what of your wife?’

  ‘I will do whatever is required.’ He was still and silent a moment. ‘You and I will need to move somewhere we’re not known, and I fear I’ll have to resign myself to a less exalted calling. We must act quickly, given your situation.’